These days i don't really know what it is that i am living for.....i have become so jaded, so cynical, and so bitter that i don't quite recognize myself anymore. If you didn't know me you would say i seem so happy, so normal but i'm not. The smile on my face is so fake...and it has become too easy to fake it. I wake up every morning and i put on a mask...a look of perfection like everything in my life is exactly how i want it to be.

My heart feels torn...like it's been ripped into a gazillion pieces and dispersed into the world. I have strings tying me to different people, strings i want to cut so that i can keep my heart to myself...but i can't. Now what do i do?